Tuesday, October 16, 2007
sun shines through crispy fall days
a couple of good life events have shown face today. beauty in the form of crispy fall days, warm and welcome sunlight breaking through clouds and a bit of courage from a small place enacted upon by surprise.
funny how in life, those things you appreciate most are given and taken away most frequently. or is it because you appreciate them most you notice most the varying proximity of those items to self. distance makes the heart grow fonder. well, yes, sometimes. other times distance might bring clarity to a muddled mind or others distance brings only more distance. the world is not so simple to provide only the single result of "fonder". i'm off track.
distance in my case with true crispy fall days certainly makes my heart more fond of those days when given the chance to experience them again. you see in texas, autumn days just don't feel the same. though here i am in maryland in the fall and the days are perfection.
how did the universe arrange my placement here, at this time? several friends of mine believe that if you ask the universe for a something, really put it out there then it will come to you. careful what you wish for, the universe is mighty powerful. the gods in the universe have been kind to me in the provision of crispy fall days, two weeks full of them. wish granted.
autumn/fall is my favorite time of the year. the quality of the air, the color of the sunlight, the angle of the sun in relationship to the axis of the earth, the activity of the animals in preparation for winter and the smells of nature and trees as they begin to drop their leaves. once again the sculpted structure of our trees are revealed and oh the shadows they provide when the sun in low and rising or mid height and falling late in day.
for me autumn is the season of love. as the days cool, hand holding makes evident the warmth two persons can share, coffee and tea become more pleasurable and provide reason to join with another for conversation, people touch more in cool weather and are revived by the chilly motivation to move and play. the colors of autumn are of the earth, grounded and deep. the textures of autumn are many, chilly fingertips, more sensitive to touch than those heated and hot. and the clarity of the air is most fantastic, breathing in takes on new dimension. autumn is home to me.
i spoke of courage too. small bits of it. this small bit of courage is in the company of clarity, truthfulness, sincerity and optimism without the company of shame, fear or regret. the act is truly a simple one and quite possibly nothing of note for many but for me a great mountain and one i've kept silent more often than not. i shared without expectation an admiration for another.
if that sounds small to you then you're not yet aware of the intensity at which i live my life. i may and do express admiration to my friends and family frequently. i express my admiration of act and deed to those i live and work with. rarely do i share an admiration that may risk the balance of the heart.
this time though was different and i think i know why. i believe that i'm in a place where being alone is more than ok. in fact it's often my preference. there are times though when another person stands out from the crowd and often, i the coward that i am fail to share with them my observation of their gleaming qualities. i have decided that it's no longer acceptable to do so. regardless of the outcome, i vow to share with persons my admiration of their special qualities.
maybe the sharing will make their day. maybe the sharing will inspire them to concentrate on the positive. maybe the sharing will allow them to share with another an admiration they have observed and maybe the sharing will bring more love into the world. who knows. if given without expectation, anything is possible. if tied to expectation, then the sharing is not truly sharing but rather a means to an end and may sour quickly. i've had that experience more than enough times. no thank you.
give freely and reap great joy. give freely and reap great joy.