Tuesday, June 26, 2007
less and less again
an update on the purging. as thought, it's not been any problem at all in the letting go of past work. it feels good actually. in some way i feel like it's bringing me closer to the now. things get heavy when you hang on.
i think i've held on to things because in some way i felt that they defined me. defined my reason for being, my success, my relevance in my chosen career and what i perceived as my importance to others and my craft. i don't want to do that any longer. it's too heavy. it's not true. the stuff is not me. i hope this is a positive sign. i'm sure it is a positive sign.
some folks may think that i'm destroying bits of my own history. i think it's just that; history, steps that brought me to where i am today.
and this is where i am at today; i like space. i like light. i like creative endeavours. i like acting on an idea the moment it occurs. i like watching things grow. i like cooking for friends and family. i like observing birds, squirrels, butterflies and little creatures on a breezy cool day. i like reading a good book. i like working hard so that the results are more satisfying. i like beer. i like my iced coffee in the morning and afternoon. i like hanging with softiesupercat. i like sharing conversation with my family on the phone. i like being out of doors. i like riding my bike just for the heck of it and with no destination in mind. i like the way i feel when i finish a run. i like keeping my home sweet and simple. i like learning the old school way of doing things. i like my neighbors. i like my comfy bed. i like my garden oh so very much. i like having tasks to do. and i still don't mind that i'm not a good speller. in fact i revel in the knowing. it makes me laugh inside.
that's just a small list. but a list long enough to prove that i don't need all the old stuff from past jobs to define me. i'll keep less and then less again.
it's the people i love i hope most to keep near as long as i am able.